How Music Enhances Emotional Intelligence

The Power of Emotional Awareness 💫

I’m not surprising anyone by saying that emotional intelligence is incredibly important. It’s not just the key to building authentic, deep connections with others—it’s just as crucial, if not more so, for understanding and knowing ourselves. Every emotion carries a message; behind each one lies an unmet need. To truly care for yourself and address what’s missing, you must first learn to listen to your emotions.

I’ve often heard people say they want to tune into their hearts and bodies but simply don’t know how. Time and again, I’ve seen sadness, anxiety, anger, or fear reflected in someone’s face and eyes—yet they seem completely unaware of their own state of being. How can we recognize when something is wrong, when a situation is draining us, if we can’t feel the repulsion, frustration, fear, or sadness that our bodies are trying to communicate? Having an extensive emotional vocabulary is valuable, but if we can’t truly feel, identify, and understand the sensations within us, we won’t get very far.

Repressed Emotions & Physical Symptoms 😞💥

I only became aware of my anger in my early twenties. Before that, I had completely repressed it—too afraid of how it would be received by those around me. For years, I was convinced I simply didn’t have anger. Turns out, it was there all along—just hidden, transformed into something else. In my case, it manifested as debilitating chronic migraines. I had repressed anger for so long that I forgot what it felt like in my body, how it showed up in my sensations.

When I finally realized that my migraines were rooted in unexpressed anger, I started creating a safe space for it. Alone in my room, I’d put on loud, aggressive music, shake my arms, hit my bed, and dance like I was possessed. And it was wild to see what happened—the migraines, which usually lasted for days and made me physically ill, would disappear. I called this my “anger meditation” and practiced it daily. The more I embraced my anger, the fewer migraines I had. Over time, I grew confident enough to express my emotions outwardly—to real people, not just my pillows.

We all repress emotions for different reasons, but a huge part of it is the lack of a safe, judgment-free space to express them. That pressure can come from culture, family, friends, or relationships. But if the space doesn’t exist—create it yourself.

Music as an Emotional Mirror 🎶✨

Music has an incredible ability to create a safe space for exploring our emotions. When I find a song that truly resonates with my heart, it feels like falling in love—my whole body vibrates with the rhythm, completely immersed in the sound. This happens when the song reflects the emotions I’m experiencing in that moment.

In many ways, music acts as a mirror, making our emotions more visible than we sometimes can ourselves. It’s often easier to identify the feelings carried by a song than to pinpoint what’s stirring inside us. But over time, as we attune ourselves to these emotional reflections, we become more familiar with the sensations we call emotions. With practice, we learn to notice and name them as they arise.

I remember working in a restaurant a few years ago when a coworker played breakup songs for three hours straight during a shift. When he finally changed the playlist, I casually asked if he was feeling upset or sorrowful. He looked at me, completely shocked.

“I haven’t been through a breakup,” he said, confused. “But I have been listening to sad songs for weeks now.”

It had never occurred to him that the music he was drawn to might be reflecting something deeper within. After a moment, he admitted that now that he thought about it, he had been feeling heavy. The music had been speaking for him before he even realized what he was carrying.

How I Use Music to Identify My Emotions 🎧💛

Music is one of my favorite tools for understanding what I’m feeling. Here’s how I use it to connect with my emotions:

1️⃣ I start with a short meditation. I place my hand on my heart and take deep breaths for a few minutes. This helps quiet my mind and tune into my heart. I see if any emotions naturally rise to the surface.

2️⃣ If I’m unsure what I’m feeling, I let music guide me. I play whatever song I feel drawn to—it might take a bit of searching to find the one that feels just right.

3️⃣ I move with the music. I let my body express what words can’t. Sometimes, I dance freely. Other times, I use specific movements to bring emotions forward. For example, when I’m feeling sadness, I imagine waltzing, gently moving my arms to bring that emotion up from my heart.

4️⃣ I seek deeper insight. If I want to understand more about the emotion and the needs behind it, I turn to my oracle, tarot, or soul cards. (If you’re curious about using oracles, check out my guide on How to Use an Oracle! 🔮)

Creating Your Own Emotional Ritual 🌿

I strongly encourage you to experiment with different tools to connect with your emotions. Find what feels natural and safe for you. Maybe it’s closing all the blinds, lighting incense, taking a bath, journaling, painting, screaming, or talking to a friend or therapist.

Over time, you’ll develop your own ritual—one that helps you quickly turn inward and understand what’s happening inside of you. I’m still exploring new tools and learning to listen to my heart. It’s a beautiful inner journey, and I hope this inspires you on yours. ✨💛